There are a couple of ways to ensure that you have well-disciplined children both at home and in school. One of, and the oldest method of punishing a child at home and in school has been to flog such child.
I have made my comparison and I am here trying to answer the question – Is Flogging A Part Of Good Parenting?
I am sure I am not the only one asking such question. In recent times, we have seen some parents in the UK and in the US facing court charges bordering on flogging a child.
One other basis of this article is to clear my mind on whether it is best to flog children when they are wrong or to use other alternative ways to ensure that full discipline is carried out.
Several cases are also out there on children that sustained injuries ranging from minor to major ones from their caretaker. Such injury came to them as marks they will continue to live with.
Two things to know about flogging children
There are two major things to know about this method of keeping your child in check.
One is that he can outgrow a stage of flogging. At this point, such child can revolt against such action if you continue to flog him as a means to show full control. What it means is that this flogging as a means of correcting the child may reach a point when the boy will grow into another thing. At this point, the child may be beyond correction and will take it as a routine.
Also, this can leave physical damage to the child. You can damage your physically through flogging. Some children are blind today because their parents were attempting to flog them.
Other measures of keeping your child on check
- Show example and tell: as a parent, it is important that you live your life knowing that you have children or a child that is mimicking all you are doing. When your child continue to learn from you for a long time, there are many reasons including scientific supporting that your child will end being another form of you. What then should you do? If there are behaviors that make you to exhibit certain character, it is important for you to be open and tell him why it is so. Giving simple explanation to your child makes it better as they will learn the pros and cons of the action.
- Set boundaries for them: it is very important for you to explain to your children where their limit should fall. When they know that they have a limit in their actions, it will help them not to exceed such limit. However, it is important that you don’t set unrealistic limits for them. You have to balance it with trend and stage of life.
- Give consequences: one of the best ways to set caution for your children is to let them know the consequences of their actions. You must not be the one punishing them. You can allow the consequences of their actions to punish them. When they are able to face the real consequence of their actions, it will help to caution them for future occurrences. Here, they are not just afraid of your rod but afraid of what it will cause at the end.
- Hear them out: sometimes parents jump into conclusion. I remember one certain when I was a child, my father flogged me and later apologized for flogging me without knowing what really played out. You need to hear from them and know what caused the problem. Therefore, before you draw your conclusion on whether to flog then or not, ensure that you have known the root cause.
- Give them your attention: it is wrong to assume that children should know everything. There are many things they may not know. Therefore, it is important that you understand that they have limit of information when it comes to morality and what should be done. Therefore, do not let them feel left out. Show them that parental role and support. It will really help.
- Use reverse psychology on them: how about emphasizing their good sides? How about making them feel relaxed and happy whenever they do the right things? It is good that you don’t dwell only on the bad sides of a child. Give him space. Praise him when he does the right thing and also caution when he is at fault. Don’t just make it look bad as if the child can never do good thing.
- Know when not to respond: a good parent knows when to talk and when not to ignore. This is a very good principle in handling children misbehaviors. It will also help your child to know that you are not just against them.
- Be prepared for trouble: some children may actually be coming up as an offshoot of what they are taught by their stubborn peers. This is why it is important that you be ready at all times for such troubles. To reduce this kind of issues coming from their peers, you can continue to give your children enough attention and ask them questions at the right time.
- Redirect bad behavior: when you are able to understand your child, you will certainly understand when the bad behavior is newly learnt. You can redirect it to good ones by teaching your child the good and bad sides of what he is doing or intend to do.
I will not advise complete withdrawal from flogging a child. However, it is good to moderate it. Try to bring in other measures of correcting your child as outlined above.
So, instead of beating your child everytime, you can learn from what is above and add it to other ones you already know. It is also very important that you know.that flogging a child has not been proven to be the best in terms of guiding a child towards the right path.